Wednesday, September 26, 2007

This Townie Really is C-R-A-Z-Y!

Okay I just read this story on Philebrity and it highlights the pure insanity of a former West Chester townie. His name is Jonathan Lee Riches and he is currently incarcerated at Federal Correctional Institution (FCI) Williamsburg in Salters, South Carolina for his part in a multi-state wire-fraud scam where he and his codefendents used a fake AOL spam message to capture the identities of many unsuspecting people. He then used their identities to buy stuff, open credit card accounts, you name it.

But that's not the crazy part. Apparently he is a full-blown, unmedicated, paranoid schizophrenic who entertains himself in prison by filing dozens of ridiculous law-suits. You have to read his Wikipedia page to see the sheer enormity of the suits, but here are a few highlights:

- On March 8, 2006, Mr. Riches (AKA Gino Romano) filed a lawsuit against DEF CON and claiming the defendants had "joined alliance with Al-Qaeda, Irish Republican Army, Nigerian Janjaweeds, and Colombian FARC." The lawsuit also claims that Mr. Riches is an "underground hacker superhero" and that "DEF CON's annual computer hacker convention has my name and picture, and statue on event tickets and baloons (sic)". On May 7, 2007 this lawsuit was dismissed.

- On March 9, 2006, Mr. Riches filed his most famous and largest lawsuit. The civil rights lawsuit naming George W. Bush et al as defendants. The "et al" list continues for 56 more pages and includes 783 defendants (both living, dead, and non-entities) such as the survivors of the Holocaust, Pizza Hut, Dane Cook, Three Mile Island, Paris Hilton, Dennis Hopper, Mount Rushmore, the Ming Dynasty, Mein Kampf, "Various Buddhist Monks", Medieval Times, The Da Vinci Code, and the celestial object Pluto.

- On July 16, 2007 Mr. Riches filed a lawsuit against the Mossad, Central Intelligence Agency, and Larry King Live claiming the "defendants are in a vast conspiracy to hijack my torso, three toes, and my constitutional rights and ship them to a secret headquarters in Concord, NH." Mr. Riches also alleges that the "Mossad told me personally on April 20, 2007 that they are going to hang me on a cross next to Jesus Christ.", that "Larry King Live is a voodoo witch doctor who stole my identity on February 25th, 2003 and purchased lead paint, Chips Ahoy!, Planter's Peanuts, and Ziploc bags under my identity. Distributed them to the CIA to microwave test my DNA.", and that "The CIA on January 4, 2006, plead allegiance to Al-Qaeda.." The court refused to docket the case because the court did not receive a filing fee from Riches.

- On August 3, 2007, Mr. Riches filed a second lawsuit against Michael Vick and other defendants including the Atlanta Falcons NFL team, PETA, and Jason Michael Carpenter seeking 662,000,000,000,000 trillion dollars in British gold delivered by J.B. Hunt Trucking to the front-gate of FCI Williamsburg. This lawsuit claims that "Michael Vick and my co-defendant Jason Michael Carpenter from my Houston criminal case, hacked into my court records in Pennsylvania. Carpenter under Vick's orders sent a botnet trojan into my records at Chester County Court of Common Pleas (in West Chester, PA) and put false information in my dockets to make me look evil." Mr. Riches also claims "Michael Vick was also involved with the Pan Am Flight 103 explosion in Scotland." (it should be noted that Vick was only 8 years old at the time) and that "Michael Vick had a sexual relationship with my co-defendant Jason Michael Carpenter." This civil case was terminated on August 16, 2007

And these are just a few of the DOZENS of crazy suits. You could spend hours just browsing through them. I love that Michael Vick is not only guilty of dog fighting but that he was involved in the Pan Am 103 flight explosion. Plus Michael Vick had a sexual relationship with the co-defendant. Haha. Good times.

He usually files each suit in a different federal court jurisdiction. They say he does this to avoid sanctions against people filing multiple frivolous lawsuits in the same jurisdiction, leading people to wonder if he is actually disturbed, or if he's just passing time during his incarceration.

I guess this is what really happens when you have too much time on your hands. My Mom always warned me about that.